Honouring Your Boundaries is a Form of Self-Care & Self Respect
Creating healthy boundaries means making yourself your own priority by listening to your body, recognising your needs and take time for self-care, whatever that looks like for you.
Have you ever noticed you do everything you can to please other people?
Or you always try to fit in the best you can?
You try so hard to be the person you think everyone else needs you to be and forget to just be yourself and honour what you need most.
What good does it serve you?
What would happen if you said no? Or what would happen if you took time to “fill your own cup” first? I will tell you… you’ll show up a better partner, friend, parent, sibling, colleague…
Honouring BOUNDARIES is not always easy. It’s something that comes up with most of my clients, whether this applies to relationships or balancing different aspects of life. NOT respecting your own or other people’s boundaries can damage relationships.
Getting clear on your own boundaries helps to understand and accept other people’s boundaries.
My top 5 tips for setting clear, healthy boundaries:
You can still be kind and have healthy boundaries - If you need to reject someone who you genuinely want to spend time with, just not at that time - find a positive way to frame your choice and offer an alternative date.
It’s ok to say no if you don’t want to do something - Be authentic to yourself, listen to your body and if you know you don’t want to do that thing, then you can choose not to. It might feel awkward at first, but the people who matter will come round and understand.
Limit the time with people who drain your energy - This can be a challenge because you may feel the need to nurture someone else’s feelings but if time with this person is impacting your own emotional wellbeing, then it’s time to put your own healthy boundary in.
Slow down to speed up - It’s ok to say no even if you do want to do that thing – recognise if you are trying to do too much, that you need to chill, switch off and TRUST that whoever or whatever you are saying no to, will be ok with it, if you frame this positively (as in tip 2). Don’t over commit.
Speak your truth – be honest with people when you are setting boundaries, but you also don’t need to go into details and ‘over-share’. Perhaps talk to your friends, family, colleagues about the concept of boundaries, so that you can all have a shared understanding.
Be kind to yourself by honouring your boundaries.
Perhaps you will start to notice other people around you setting clear healthy boundaries. Notice them. Notice how you feel if it applies to you. Do you honour your own boundaries?
Journal prompt:
What do healthy boundaries look like to you? What is the one thing you’ll do or change to honour your boundaries?
